Whether you’re a long-term fan or someone who’s discovered Star Wars through their kids, you won’t be turning to the dark side after hearing our hilarious jokes. In fact, if your looking for jokes elsewhere, you’d be looking in Alderaan places!
The Star Wars universe has had a resurgence in recent years thanks to the new movies, the inclusion of Star Wars themed rides at Disney Land and LEGO partnerships and now a whole new generation this amazing space saga.
My kids have gone absolutely crazy for Star Wars. Their parties consist of sleepover where they watch the movies. They ask for lightsabers and Star Wars LEGO sets for Christmas and dress up as Han Solo for Halloween and so we wanted to curate a list of the funniest Star Wars jokes in the galaxy for them.
Now you too can make your kids giggle by asking them if they’d like their toast the way Darth Vader likes it – on the dark side!
Enjoy our hilarious list of Star Wars jokes below and may the force be with you to deliver these jokes without cracking up first!
Luke Skywalker Jokes
What kind of car does Luke Skywalker drive?
Why is Luke Skywalker always invited to a picnic?
Because he always has the forks with him!
How does Luke Skywalker always know what he’s getting for his birthday?
Because he feels the presence!
What is the internal temperature of a Tauntaun?
What did the dentist say to Luke Skywalker when he went for his check up?
May the floss be with you!
Where did Luke get his bionic hand?
From a second-hand store.
What kind of spaceship did Luke fly in grade school?
What was Luke’s secret codename before he got his mechanical limb?
Luke Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi walk into a Chinese restaurant. Ten minutes into the meal, Luke still can’t figure out the chopsticks, dropping food everywhere. Obi-Wan finally snaps: “Use the forks, Luke.”
Luke: What’s for dinner tonight, Dad?
Anakin: Wookiee steak.
Luke: Is it any good?
Anakin: It’s a little chewy.
Darth Vader Jokes
How does Darth Vader like his toast?
On the Dark Side.
Why did Anakin Skywalker cross the road?
To get to the dark side.
What do you call an evil procrastinator?
How long has Anakin Skywalker been evil?
Since the Sith Grade.
How did Darth Vader cheat at poker?
He kept altering the deal.
What did Darth Vader say to the Emperor at the Star Wars auction?
“What is thy bidding, my master?”
What did Darth Vader say when he walked into a vegetarian restaurant?
“I find your lack of steak disturbing.”
Why are there no stairs in the Death Star?
Because everyone uses the ele-vader.
What did Darth Vader say to the Emperor at the Star Wars auction?
“What is thy bidding, my master?
Which Star Wars character works at a restaurant?
How did Darth Vader know what Luke was getting for his birthday?
He felt his presents.
Why is Darth Vader not safe for children under 3 years old?
He’s a choking hazard!
What do you get when you cross Darth Vader with an elephant?
Why didn’t Yoda have body odour?
Because he used de-Yoda-rant!
Why is Yoda such a fantastic gardener?
Because he has green fingers!
Why is Yoda such a good gardener?
Because he has a green thumb.
What’s Yoda’s advice for going to the bathroom?
Doo-doo or doo-doo-not-do.
Why did the movies come out 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3?
In charge of scheduling, Yoda was.
Why can’t you count on Yoda to pick up the tab?
Because he’s always a little short.
Why did Episodes 4, 5, and 6 come out before 1, 2, and 3?
In charge of directing, Yoda was.
Why did Yoda cross the road?
Because the chickens forced him to!
Obi-Wan Kenobi Jokes
What did Obi-Wan say at the rodeo?
Use the horse, Luke!
What do you call Kenobi triplets?
What’s the name of Obi-Wan’s twin brother?
Which program does a Jedi use to open PDF files?
Adobe Wan Kenobi.
What did the specter of Obi Wan Kenobi say to the bartender?
“Give me a beer and a mop.”
Which Jedi became a rock star?
Bon Jovi-Wan Kenobi.
Which Star Wars character travels around the world?
What did Obi Wan Kenobi do when he needed money?
He took out a bank clone!
What did Obi-Wan tell Luke when his young apprentice was having a difficult time using chopsticks at the Chinese restaurant?
“Use the fork, Luke.”
Han Solo Jokes
Han Solo’s name changed when he married Leia. What did he change it to?
What did Han Solo say to the waiter who recommended the haddock?
“Never sell me the cods.”
What do you call it when only one Star Wars character gives you a round of applause?
A Hand Solo.
Why should you never tell jokes on the Melenium Falcon?
Because it might crack up!
Princess Leia Jokes
What do you call a rebel princess who only shops at Whole Foods?
I asked Princess Leia for a list of her favorite bands…
It’s Alderaan Duran
Who Did Princess Leia’s Hair?
Why did Princess Leia contract coronavirus?
Because she went to woo Han.
Why did Princess Leia send a distress call to Francis?
Because he was her only Pope.
Why does Princess Leia keep her hair tied up in buns?
So it doesn’t Hang So-low.
What did Princess Leia and Han Solo name their other kid?
We are not naming our son Guitar Solo.
What is Princess Leia’s favorite Aerosmith song?
Ewok this way.
What would happen if princess leia went to the dark side?
Then she would be luke’s sithter
Why did Han Solo wait to ask Princess Leia to marry him ?
He didn’t want to force it
Why did Princess Leia date so many guys before she found Han?
She was looking for love in Alderaan places.
Chewbacca & Ewok Jokes
Have you tried the gluten-free Wookiee treats?
No, but I heard they were a little chewie.
How do Ewoks communicate over long distances?
How does Wicket get around Endor?
What do you call Chewbacca when he gets chocolate in his fur?
A chocolate chip Wookiee!
Which website did Chewbacca get arrested for creating?
What side of an Ewok has the most hair?
How do you make stir fry on Endor?
With an e-wok!
How do you unlock doors on Kashyyyk?
With a woo-key.
An Ewok strolls into a bar and says to the bartender, “I’ll have a whisky and… soda.”
The bartender says, “Sure thing—but why the little pause?”
“Dunno,” says the Ewok. “I’ve had them all my life.”
Is BB hungry?
What do you call an invisible droid?
Why was R2-D2 angry?
Because people kept pushing his buttons.
What do you call a droid that likes taking the scenic route?
Jedi & Sith Jokes
What do Jedis order at Chinese restaurants?
What do you call five Siths piled on top of a lightsaber?
A Sith kebab.
Where do the Sith shop for lightsabers?
At the Darth Mall.
Why do Doctors make the best Jedi?
Jedi must have patience.
What did the Jedi say to the sheep?
May the force be with ewe!
What do you call a nervous Jedi?
What is a Jedi’s favorite toy?
Where does Kylo Ren get his creepy black clothes?
From his closet.
Rebels & Storm Trooper Jokes
How are Stormtroopers like a shark in a fight?
They both end up missing a Finn
What is a Stormtrooper’s favorite TV show?
Game of Clones.
What’s a Rebel’s favorite TV talent show?
Why are Death Star pilots fed up with space battles?
Because they always end up in a TIE.
A clone trooper walks into a pub and asks the barman, “Hey, have you seen my brother?” “I dunno,” says the barman, “What does he look like?”
Other Funny Star Wars Jokes
Did you hear about the Gungan who became a taxi cab driver?
His name is Car Car Binks.
How do Tusken Raiders cheat on their taxes?
They always single file, to hide their numbers.
How do you get down from a bantha?
You don’t. You get down from a goose.
What did Palpatine say to the intern when they asked how many pizzas they needed for his birthday party?
What do you call a bird of prey with a thousand lives?
A millennium falcon!
What do you get if you mix a bounty hunter with a tropical fruit?
What goes, “Ha, ha, ha, haaaa…. AGGGHHHH! Thump”?
An Imperial Officer laughing at Darth Vader.
What is Jabba the Hutt’s middle name?
What kind of tea do bounty hunters drink?
What time is it when an AT-AT steps on your chronometer?
Time to get a new chronometer.
What’s a baseball player’s least favorite Star Wars movie?
The Umpire Strikes Back.
Where do Gungans store their fruit preserves?
Where do you take a sick Tauntaun?
To a Hoth-pital
Which “Star Wars” character lives in Florida?
Which restaurant does Jabba like to go to for dinner?
He loves Pizza Hutt!
Why couldn’t Poe Dameron find his sandwich?
Because BB-8 it
Why did Jabba win the pizza contest?
Because no one outpizzas the Hutt.
Why is a gossip magazine like the Imperial Fleet?
They’re both full of star destroyers
Star Wars Knock Knock Jokes
Vader minute while i tell a joke!
Ren is dinner ready I’m starving?!
Luke out! Here comes another knock, knock joke!
You’re the Obi-Wan for me!
Yoda leh eee hoooo!
Watto you wanto from a me?
That’s All Folks!
I wish I could have seen the Luke on your face when you were reading through our hilarious Star Wars jokes. If you want to continue to impress your kids with your serious Star Wars knowledge, you can tell them that Yoda was almost played by a monkey!
According The Making of Star Wars by J.W. Rinzler, George Lucas had initially planned for Yoda to be played by a monkey actor wearing a green mask and carrying a cane.
Luckily a monkey expert on set pointed out that the monkey would constantly pull the mask off and the crew would never get their scenes done. So Muppet master Jim Henson was asked to come on board and he suggested the casting on Frank Oz (who voices Miss Puggy) as the voice of Yoda.
The rest is history and we have the Yoda that we know and love on the big screen.
If you’re looking for more jokes, then check out our Jokes & Riddles page where we have everything from corny knock knock jokes to hare-larious Easter jokes and hilarious Disney jokes that your kids will love.