Gobble gobble turkey lovers! It’s that time of year when we eat too much and find ourselves stuffed to the brim with nothing to do but lie around and make each other chuckle. So we’re here to tickle your funny bone (and maybe your wishbone!) with some classic Thanksgiving jokes for kids.
We had such a great time writing our Easter jokes and puns that we wanted to relive the experience, and oh my gourd, have we got some good ones! We’ve got all the hits: Turkey, Food & Dinner, Pilgrim, Knock-knock jokes, one-liners and more!
My kids are absolutely obsessed with jokes and puns and it’s become a family tradition to sit around after lunch and see who can get the biggest laughs with their hilarious one-liners.
Knock-knock jokes are always great for the little ones who find the format easy to follow and puns work well for older kids who are learning how playful language can be.
Our kids love all forms of jokes and it’s become a joy to watch them find new material every year and watch their confidence grow as they deliver more in depth jokes.
Thanksgiving as a holiday is great because it offers so much great material. In my house, we start the day with ‘Gobble til you Wobble’ and end it with ‘Silence of the yams’ and you can bet there’s nothing but tears of laughter and merriment in between!
So feast your pies on our hilarious list of Thanksgiving jokes for kids and get ready to eat, drink and be cranberry!
What Kid of Jokes Are You Looking For?
Thanksgiving Jokes for Little Kids
What’s the best dance to do on Thanksgiving?
The turkey trot.
Which holiday is Dracula’s favorite?
How are a turkey, a donkey, and a monkey alike?
They all have keys.
What’s the best thing to put into a pie?
How can you make a turkey float?
You need 2 scoops of ice cream, some root beer, and a turkey.
What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter?
Quack! Quack! Quack!
What is a turkey’s favorite dessert?
What’s blue and covered in feathers?
A turkey holding its breath.
What’s the best way to stuff a turkey?
Serve him lots of pizza and ice cream!
Why do turkeys lay eggs?
Because if they dropped them, they would break.
Why did the turkey refuse dessert?
He was already stuffed.
What should you wear to Thanksgiving dinner?
Why shouldn’t you look at the turkey dressing?
Because it will make him blush.
What’s Frankenstein’s favorite Thanksgiving dish?
Monster mash potatoes and grave-y.
What’s the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner?
What happens when cranberries get sad?
They turn into blueberries.
What smells the best at a Thanksgiving dinner?
What always comes at the end of Thanksgiving?
What Thanksgiving treat is the most popular at the kids’ table?
What did the pumpkin say after Thanksgiving?
What does a Pilgrim call his best friend?
Why did the Pilgrims sail from England to America?
Because they missed their plane.
If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
The pilgrims’ cows came to America on what ship?
What do Thanksgiving and Halloween have in common?
One has gobblers, the other goblins.
What’s one thing that you’ll have in common with a teddy bear on Thanksgiving?
You’ll both be filled with stuffing.
Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Yes – a building can’t jump at all.
Thanksgiving Turkey Jokes
Can you tell the difference between a female and a male turkey?
The male is the one with the TV remote.
Fruit comes from a fruit tree, so where does turkey come from?
What type of glass does a turkey drink from?
What did the turkey say to the computer?
What do turkeys like to do on sunny days?
What do you call a running turkey?
What is a turkey ghost called?
What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus?
Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving.
What does an English turkey say to another English turkey on Thanksgiving morning?
To be or not to be roasted, that is the question.
What happened to the turkey that got in a fight?
He got the stuffing knocked out of him!
What is the difference between a chicken and a turkey?
Chickens celebrate Thanksgiving!!
What kind of weather does a turkey like?
What sound does a limping turkey make?
What sound does an astronomer turkey make?
Hubble, Hubble, Hubble.
What sound does a turkey’s phone make?
Wing, Wing! Wing, Wing!
Why do turkeys always go, “gobble, gobble”?
Because they never learned good table manners!
What’s the most musical part of a turkey?
What’s the best song to play while cooking a turkey?
All about that baste.
When do you serve tofu turkey?
What’s a turkey’s favorite song?
“I’m Dreaming of a White Christmas”
Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?
Why can’t you take a turkey to church?
Because they use such FOWL language.
Why did the police arrest the turkey?
They suspected fowl play.
Why did the turkey cross the road twice?
He wanted people to think he was a chicken.
Why did the turkey sit on the tomahawk?
Why did they let the turkey join the band?
Because he had his own drumsticks.
Why don’t you let a turkey get near corn?
Because they will gobble, gobble, gobble it.
What’s a turkey’s favorite dessert?
When are turkeys the most grateful?
The day after Thanksgiving.
Why did Mom’s turkey seasoning taste a little off last year?
She ran out of thyme.
Why did the turkey bring a microphone to dinner?
He was ready for a roast.
What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children?
If your father could see you now, he’d turn over in his gravy!
What do you call it when it rains turkeys?
What’s inside a genie’s turkey?
What happened when the turkey played football?
It got ejected for fowl play!
What do you get when a turkey lays an egg on top of a barn?
Thanksgiving Food & Dinner Jokes
Why did the farmer run a steamroller over his potato field on Thanksgiving Day?
He wanted to raise mashed potatoes.
What vegetables would you like with your Thanksgiving dinner?
Why was the Thanksgiving soup so expensive?
It had 24 carrots.
What do monsters have on their Thanksgiving table?
Knives, Forks and Goons.
How many chefs does it take to stuff a Thanksgiving turkey?
Only one and even then it’s a pretty tight squeeze.
What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter?
What do you call a retired vegetable?
Who helps the little pumpkins cross the road safely?
The crossing gourd.
What side dish tells the worst jokes?
What is your favorite thing to make for Thanksgiving dinner?
What side dish do you bring for Thanksgiving dinner when you accidentally sat on the sweet potatoes?
What can never ever be eaten for Thanksgiving dinner?
What role do green beans play in Thanksgiving dinner?
How did the salt and pepper welcome all the guests?
By saying, “Seasoning’s greetings!”
What did the salad say to the butter who kept making jokes?
You’re on a roll.
What did the sweet potato say when it was asked if it was hungry?
“Yes, I yam.”
What’s something usually insulting, but not on Thanksgiving?
A family member giving you the bird.
Why were the beans accused of being jealous of the other side dishes?
They were so green.
Thanksgiving Jokes About Pilgrims
Why did the Pilgrims eat turkey at Thanksgiving?
Because they couldn’t get the moose in the oven!
Why does a pilgrim’s pants always fall down?
Because they wear their belt buckle on their hat.
What happened to the Pilgrim who was shot at by an Indian?
He had an arrow escape.
Why did the Pilgrim eat a candle?
He wanted a light snack!
What kind of cars would pilgrims drive today?
Why didn’t the pilgrim want to make the bread?
It’s a crummy job.
What did pilgrims use to bake cookies?
When the Pilgrims landed, where did they stand?
On their feet!
What’s the smallest unit of measurement in the pilgrim cookbook?
What do you call a pilgrims vocabulary?
What’s a pilgrim’s mother called?
What do you call the evil being that comes to get pilgrims?
What kind of face does a pilgrim make when he’s in pain?
What do you call the age of a pilgrim?
What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?
What kind of tan did pilgrims get at the beach?
If pilgrims traveled on the Mayflower, what do college students travel on?
When did the Pilgrims first say “God bless America?”?
The first time they heard America sneeze!
If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for?
Other Funny Thanksgiving Jokes
What is a pumpkin’s favorite sport?
Why did the policeman stop you on your way home last Thanksgiving?
Because you far exceeded your feed limit.
Should you have your whole family for Thanksgiving dinner?
No, you should just have the turkey!
On Thanksgiving, what does Dad have in common with an exhausted baseball player?
They’re both likely to fall asleep between plates.
What did the aunt say to her sulking son on Thanksgiving?
“You’re looking a little (Pil)grim.”
What should you say when your family begs you to stop making these corny Thanksgiving jokes?
“I can’t quit cold turkey!”
With Coronavirus being a possible concern this year, what’s likely to be the most popular side dish?
In what country is Thanksgiving ironically not celebrated?
What do you get if you cross a pointy black hat and some leftover turkey?
What always comes at the beginning of a parade?
The letter P.
Thanksgiving Knock-Knock Jokes
Arthur any leftovers?
Don eat all the gravy, I want some more!
Norma Lee who?
Norma Lee I don’t drink eat this much!
Tamara we’ll eat all the leftovers!
Annie body seen the turkey?
Phillip a big plate of turkey and start eating!
Tamara we’ll be having tons of leftovers.
Wanda go watch the Thanksgiving Day Parade?
Funny Thanksgiving One-liners
A woman was looking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn’t find one big enough for her family. She asked the stock boy, “Do these turkeys get any bigger?” The stock boy answered, “No ma’am, they’re dead.”
Jimmy: Mmmmm! That turkey smells good and it’s not even done yet. How long will it be?
Mom: About the same length as it was before I put it into the oven, I suppose.
Asked to write a composition entitled, “What I’m thankful for on Thanksgiving,”
little Timothy wrote, “I am thankful that I’m not a turkey.”
About two weeks into November, one turkey turns to his pal and says, “I have a feeling something’s going down. The farmer just unfriended me on Facebook.”
You think you’re crazy about Thanksgiving? You’ve got nothing on the turkeys. When Thanksgiving approaches, they literally lose their heads!
Funny Thanksgiving Quotes
Thanksgiving dinners take 18 hours to prepare. They are consumed in 12 minutes. Half-times take 12 minutes. This is not coincidence.Erma Bombeck
Cooking Tip: Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out.Nicole Hollander
Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie.Jim Davis
I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.Erma Bombeck
You can tell you ate too much for Thanksgiving when you have to let your bathrobe out.Jay Leno
That’s All She Wrote!
We hope you enjoyed our Thanksgiving jokes for kids. As fun as this list is to compile, it’s also adding to your child’s development. Teaching kids how to tell jokes can help them develop language, social and imagination skills as well as boosting their confidence.
In fact, the psychologist L.S. Vygotsky believed that humorous interactions with children as young as babies was an important part of their cognitive development (peekaboo anyone?).
Consider the wordplay associated with good puns or knock-knock jokes, the memory required to remember a punch line, to time a joke well and the confidence required to command a room. Suddenly you can see that some casual after-lunch jokes could actually evolve into important life skills for your little ones.
They also will have jokes that don’t land, which improves resilience and their social skills increase as they learn what makes their peers laugh. Best of all, these jokes represent lovely family bonding time and that is absolutely immeasurable in its value.